The IFOCE website has announced this very disturbing news:

“Takeru Kobayashi is currently not scheduled to compete in the 2010 Nathan’s Famous July Fourth Hot Dog Eating Contest. In recent weeks, Major League Eating has sought to arrive at an agreement with Kobayashi, but contract negotiations have reached an impasse. MLE remains hopeful that Kobayashi, who won the contest from 2001-2006, will decide to compete this July 4th in Coney Island, when Joey Chestnut will seek his fourth consecutive title.”

I don’t know what to say, but I’m sure Kobayashi is terrified of the thunder that is Joey Chestnut.

I’m sure Joey will take the Mustard Belt again this year.

For the last year I’ve cultivated a full-blown addiction to Pho, proudly pronounced  “Fah” by elitist Silver Lake thumbring  wearing  hipsters.  I know, I know it’s fucking “fah”! ‘ I’m on it. Once I got over the pronunciation issue, it seriously became one of my favorite things to eat and sadly I order it from the same restaurant no less than 3 times a week. I’ve grown close to the wait staff at Gingergrass  in Silver Lake. So much so that I ate there for my birthday and was given complimentary drinks and cookies.  The waitresses smirk when I come in and sheepishly order the same bowl of butt-astrophe each time. And there’s the problem, every time I eat a bowl of Pho,  there is profound suffering afterwards. It’s an exercise in masochism yet I continue to do it.  To quote Lauren Hill “Why’s something feel so good when it hurts so bad?”  I’m not like this in my personal relationships. Confrontation and drama gives me endless anxiety. So why do I allow this demon Pho to ruin my sphincter and my general sense of well being?

I’ve been mentally flogging myself all last night when I stumbled across this Anthony Bourdain clip and apparently he shares my insane love of Pho. This has helped me quite a bit.  Thank you, Anthony for coming clean about your problem, its helped me conquer my own pho demons. And thank you, Vietnam for my tri-weekly steaming bowl of bowl distress.

Today was my first day working as a Writer on “Chelsea Lately”. I have to say this really is a dream come true and I feel like the luckiest person in show business. When I get excited, I sweat profusely and these pits haven’t been dry since my job interview with Chelsea last Monday. If I write anymore on this, I’ll run the risk of being one of those people that blog about their feelings and that’s just tedious. Real talk. So I’m super happy and we’ll leave it at that. Here’s a pic from first day on the job. The theme for my cubicle is “Franjypants Fantasy”.